Fast Food Mafia Revised By Andrew Shirey

Last week, Andrew Shirey’s Fast Food Mafia was all over the internet. His idea to recreate all the fast food icons as mafia bosses was original and well done. Here’s the revised and final with some new Dons. Below is an explanation direct from his deviant site:

Going from top to bottom, left to right:

Jack In The Box
After seeing those commercials with the bus collision that results in Jack’s temporary coma, specifically the amateur report that reveals the accident was a hit job involving “The King” and “R. McD.”, it seemed very appropriate. Not to mention this is the second time he’s had facial reconstructive surgery, according to the commercials, after certain company board members had tried to dispose of him earlier. So leaving the scars seemed like a good touch.

McDonald’s
Right off I knew to be careful not to make Ron McDonald look like a rip-off of Dark Knight‘s Joker. Still, comparisons have and will be made, but that can’t be helped. :shrug: After all, they both wear suits and clown makeup. Actually, I tried to go a very different direction with Ronald and his crew. I kept thinking how =lazymills1986 might design them. (She’s an awesome artist, for those who don’t know. Check her out.)

Burger King
Felt like a cross between Colombian drug lord and robber baron with his design. If B.K. had a voice, he’d sound like Señor Esteban Vihaio from Kill Bill 2. However, B.K. is not a pimp. Just making that known.

Wendy’s
Went for a more Victorian aristocrat feel in her design, but with a touch of Southern belle.

Kentucky Fried Chicken
“The Colonel” was the easiest. Didn’t do anything to him, save for changing his suit gray and adding pinstripes.

Papa John’s Pizza
Like “the Colonel”, there wasn’t much to do with “Papa” John. Honestly, having a real person to model them after takes the fun out of the creative process.

Little Caesars
Sort of looks like Clemenza from Francis Ford Coppola’s The Godfather, doesn’t he? I didn’t really see it ’til now. That was probably subconscious, since I’m a die hard Godfather fan.

Taco Bell
Okay, yes, the resemblance here was definitely intentional. Think Tony Montana, but with a Napoleon complex. The nickname comes from a combination of his short stature and the fact that he twitches constantly, since he’s a user. Yes friends, he’s a junk food junkie. :XD: As Frank Lopez says, “Rule number two: don’t get high on your own supply.”

Panda Express
This was fun to do, since all I had to go on was the panda in their logo. If you’re curious about the front of her dress, it’s part of a traditional Chinese (or traditional Chinese-style, at least) painting I found depicting a family, I’m assuming, of pandas amongst some vegetation. You catch just part of a tree, here.

Sonic’s Drive-in
Alright, now Troy “the Trojan” here is your legitimate pimp in the group. I didn’t want to make it particularly obvious, since he’s not your cheap street hustler. He’s a man among the top of the flesh peddling hierarchy. And yes, the nickname has a few meanings behind it. Also, =Arada was pushing for a presence for Sonic’s because of the girl carhops. She asked for some “roller hoes”, so she got it. :XD: Sonic’s apparently had an advertisement character called Katie the carhop, but I’m buggered on where to find any actual pictures or footage of her.

Quiznos
Remember those Quizno commercials with the talking baby, Bob? Just took him and made him up like George Nelson. I still can’t help thinking of the latter in O Brother, Where Art Thou? He’s so bipolar in that movie, but that’s what makes him memorable.

Subway
Jared Fogle made this one interesting, since it presented me with the opportunity of doing a thin and thick version of the character as twin brothers. Reminded me a little bit of Laurel and Hardy. Also, note that the thin brother is wearing suspenders while the other is not.

Dairy Queen
When you see those red lips on the DQ commercials, and if you’ve seen The Rocky Horror Picture Show, your mind can’t help jumping to that. =Arada had a big part in this character’s creation, since she was the one who introduced me to the film in the first place. The makeup was modeled to be like Tim Curry’s. I’m not into the drag queen scene myself, but that dude makes it work somehow. :XD: And I suppose watching plenty of Monty Python skits, too.

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All characters are copyright their respective owners.

(Thanks to Andrew Shirey)

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About Burger Beast

I started writing the Burger Beast food blog to tell folks about those little forgotten gems in South Florida. Over the course of the last 5 years or so I've added News, Opinions, & Tips on a variety of Food related subjects. My first love will always be Burgers but Comfort Food is where it's at. At the end of the day I’m a regular dude who writes about a bunch of things I think you should know about.