Baptist Hospital’s Food is Meh

I didn’t eat here because I had heard how wonderful it is through the grapevine. I happened to be hungry and in the hospital waiting room.

Food Container from the Oasis Cafe at the Baptist Hospital in Miami, Florida
Food Container Before the Big Reveal
Fountain Drink Cup from the Oasis Cafe at the Baptist Hospital in Miami, Florida
Fountain Drink Cup

I’ve been here a few times before and just had coffee, never any food. I was with my Dad, my cousin Fred, and sister Michelle. The three fellas get cheeseburgers while Michelle has the tuna salad.

Table Top Ad the Oasis Cafe at the Baptist Hospital in Miami, Florida
Table Top Ad

My father also ordered a hot dog for good measure. I understand this is a hospital, and they have “Healthy Eating Alternatives.”

I was reading all about it in “Peppy’s Picks,” but the quality of the food being served was pretty crappy. At least it wasn’t expensive.

Cheeseburger and Baked Fries from the Oasis Cafe at the Baptist Hospital in Miami, Florida
Cheeseburger and Baked Fries

The burger and hot dog buns were wheat. Both were fresh and tasted good, opposite the food they were holding. The thickness of the burger patty was about a quarter of the bun.

The burger was flavorless and not even the Rickey’s Hot Sauce we doused it with could salvage it.

Hot Dog from the Oasis Cafe at the Baptist Hospital in Miami, Florida
Hot Dog

The jumbo hot dog was not beef but a mix (a lousy mix at that). My father took one bite and refused to eat more, but we all did.

The fries were baked but not fresh-cut. They don’t bake well, and they need to be a little thicker (oh well).

Tuna Salad from the Oasis Cafe at the Baptist Hospital in Miami, Florida
Tuna Salad

Michelle’s salad was the highlight of the meal for me. Just because of one thing she said. She took a bite of the broccoli and said: “This tastes like the Miami Seaquarium.”

That comment forced Fred to try the broccoli, but I stayed away (he was also dumbfounded), not from the Miami Seaquarium but from the broccoli. It was a bad experience, and I can’t imagine reliving it in Smell-O-Vision.

Baptist Hospital’s Oasis Cafe
8900 North Kendall Drive
(786) 662-4000

Monday 5:00 am – 11:00 pm
Tuesday 5:00 am – 11:00 pm
Wednesday 5:00 am – 11:00 pm
Thursday 5:00 am – 11:00 pm
Friday 5:00 am – 11:00 pm
Saturday 5:00 am – 11:00 pm
Sunday 5:00 am – 11:00 pm

3 thoughts on “Baptist Hospital’s Food is Meh”

  1. Your review is on point! Us poor employees have to bring our own food or eat that crap. And its not so cheap anymore!!

    Reply
  2. I’m sorry, BB, you are out of your mind! That review is the funniest thing I’ve read in months.

    It is truly twisted.

    Who in his right mind would review the Cafeteria at Baptist?!

    As one who has spent entirely too much time eating there over the years, I hope somebody brings this review to their attention.

    Excellent job

    Reply

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